“Wasn’t it cute how we alternated saying his name?” “Steve and Heather, it’s your pick again.” So in love that you didn’t even take a break from staring into each other’s eyes for the 10 seconds it takes to think up a non-lame name. The couple name - Steve and Heather’s Team. My team name is about in Season 2 when never mind.” “Really? None of you guys watch ‘Archer’ on FX? Oh. You’ll leave the draft upset not with the roster you drafted, but over the fact so few people appreciated your team name. The niche joke name - You came up with a hilarious team name, but it’s referencing something a bit too obscure for most people in the league to get it. And it rhymes with Mayan, which works because it’s 2012 and damnit. I thought of it the night Ryan Mathews got hurt. “What does it mean? Well, it’s a reference to all the Ryans right now. You spent weeks thinking of a fantasy team name idea, jotting down ideas at work, lying awake in bed brainstorming, mentally checking out of dates and you can up with Ryansplosion? The tried too hard name - Sometimes the first idea is the best idea. You obviously didn’t see the 5-TD game he had against Georgia Tech in 2010.” “No, I don’t think it’s too early to pick Christian Ponder in the third round. He doesn’t follow the NFL very closely and makes most of his moves off of what he saw from players in college, leaving his team with a deadly mix of marginal NFL starters and NFL backups from his alma mater. The favorite college team reference - This is the only person in the league who will keep the favorite NFL team reference guy out of last. “No wonder your team always sucks with that kind of support from management.”
Your team can’t be nearly as bad as you are at picking a fantasy team name. The self-deprecating team name - “My Team Sucks” is your team name? Don’t be so hard on yourself. I’ll just trade him to Rams Forever for Tom Brady.” How did I wind up with Sam Bradford as my backup quarterback? No big deal. It’s also a sure sign that you will stack your team with way, way, way too many players from that favorite team and can easily be fleeced in trades. The favorite NFL team reference - A name like “Rams Forever” or “Raven Maniac” shows your love of your favorite team. Ages 50-plus: Your extremely crude/offensive fantasy team name will be appreciated by all, because now you are the hilariously dirty old man. Ages 35 to 49: Some league members will discuss not having you in the league anymore because you are so crude and offensive. Ages 31 to 35: Most league members will make a mental note to never let you near their wife or kids. Ages 25 to 30: Some league members will hope their wives never look at their league page and discover they are friends with such a crude and offensive person. The extremely crude/offensive name - Ages 14 to 24: Your extremely crude/offensive fantasy team name will be appreciated by all, because everyone in the league is immature. “I meant to prepare more for the draft, but I’m just so into reading Gore Vidal these last few weeks.” The attempt at impressing people - What is that name? A reference to a French art house film? Guy, it’s a fantasy football draft. “Really? Nobody is still doing the Duh Winning thing? Well, I think it’s funny.” The dated pop culture reference - BOOM! You nailed that joke about Charlie Sheen that everyone else did a few years ago or whenever that was, and in doing so established yourself as the biggest lame among your group of friends.
“Seriously, this is the best name I’ve ever come up with for my fantasy team. And what is my team name about again? Is that the band that sang “Call Me Maybe”? No one is still making Ryan Lochte jokes. Unfortunately, by Week 2 you’ll start wishing you had gone with something a bit more evergreen - a Ryan Lochte joke maybe? No, wait. The current pop culture reference - BOOM! You nailed that joke about Pussy Riot, the Russian punk band that was just convicted of hooliganism in Russia. Here are the 12 kinds of fantasy team names in every league. While you have no control over what your players do on the field, you have complete control over the most important aspect of fantasy football: picking a team name. The 12 types of fantasy football team names You have reached a degraded version of because you're using an unsupported version of Internet Explorer.įor a complete experience, please upgrade or use a supported browser